Sunday, November 25, 2012

Stating the obvious

Dear person who wrote the "war on men" article,

I am one of many women who has career aspirations. More specifically, I aspire to a mixed career consisting of medicine, science, and writing fiction. Contrary to popular belief, my interest in these careers does not stem from a desperate need to "equalize the playing field between men and women." Rather, it stems from the fact that I like medicine, science, and fiction. In fact, I like these things enough that I am willing to dedicate a big part of my life to pursuing them. Yes, I acknowledge that, in order to be successful in these fields, I will have to compete with men (and other women). However, I am not pursuing these things for the sole purpose of competing with men.

You tell me that the reason that I won't find a husband is because I am interested in these things. I should give up my futile war against men career aspirations and accept that I will be happier living a balanced life as a housewife and mother. Except that I've done that. Well, okay, not the "wife" or "mother" part. But I have spent almost a year of my life unemployed, and a large part of that was while I was living in a house with small children. And you know what? I didn't enjoy that. Sure, there are other women who do, and I have no problem with that, but I wasn't happy.

You're telling me that by having a full career and pursuing my own happiness, I'm driving men away. Men want to feel like the providers, so I should sacrifice my own happiness in order to satisfy my husband's insecurities. So in other words, what you're telling me is that a) most men don't want me to be happy, and b) most men are insecure.

Now tell me this? If that is true, why the hell would I want to marry someone who is insecure and doesn't want me to be happy? Especially when I have tons of better options?

So please, stop going around blaming me for the "war on men." I am not at war with anyone, unless of course they try to tell me how to live my life. (Oh wait, you're doing that right now.) If a man doesn't like the fact that I have a job, that's his prerogative. However, it is also my prerogative to not date that person. Instead, I'm going to date a person who finds smart women sexy...because, you know, they exist, too.

-Someone who shouldn't have to state the obvious

Oh wait, fuck. I just noticed that the article was written by a woman. (And no, I won't link to it, because that kind of bullshit doesn't deserve any more traffic.)

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